Santorum Blames ‘Homosexuals’ For Government Shutdown

darksantorumFormer Senator Rick Santorum fingered gay men today as the cause of the ongoing federal government shutdown.

In an interview with the Christian broadcaster CBN News, the Pennsylvania Republican argued that risky sexual practices of male homosexuals stoked the rise in health care costs that prompted Obamacare.

In the studio to discuss his recent documentary on how Oscar Wilde masterminded the assassination of Abraham Lincoln, Santorum also shared his thoughts on the ongoing shutdown of the U.S. federal government.

“I don’t think Republicans are to blame here,” he claimed. “This shutdown is clearly the work of homosexuals. First it was San Francisco, then marriage and now this. The gays just can’t stop screwing things up for the rest of us.”

“I’m sorry, I don’t quite understand,” host Chuck Anderson responded. “Gays have certainly ruined marriage. But how are they to blame for the government shutdown?”

“Chuck, it’s simple,” Santorum continued. “Gay sex gone wrong is the number one cause of emergency room visits in this country. I have a friend who works in the ER, and he tells me all the horror stories: dildos stuck inside rectums, accidental condom inhalations, broken light bulbs up the anus.

“I mean it’s sickening. It really is sickening. But more than that it’s also extremely expensive. Can you imagine what it costs to remove a Nintendo Wii remote from someone’s colon?

“Gays are single-handedly responsible for the rise in health care costs in this country, which set the stage for Obamacare and thus the shutdown. The media needs to stop blaming the GOP and look at the real problem.”

Brokeback Nation

The federal government has been shut down since Oct. 1, after Republicans in the House of Representatives refused to pass any spending bills until President Obama agrees to repeal the Affordable Care Act, popularly known as Obamacare.

Recent polls suggest that more Americans blame Republicans for the shutdown than Democrats, and Santorum appears to be the first to suggest gay sex as a root cause.

“Frankly I think the (Human Rights Campaign) and other so-called gay rights groups should apologize,” he blasted. “Why should the rest of us hard-working taxpayers be subsidizing their lifestyle?

“Think of the message we’re sending America’s youth: ‘Go ahead and have sex. Do it however you like, however hard you like, with whoever you like … and when you’re in the hospital with a bottle of Tabasco sauce lodged inside your rectum, don’t worry: Obamacare’s got you covered.’ Is this the America we want to live in?”

Santorum served as a U.S. senator from Pennsylvania from 1995 to 2007. He finished second to Mitt Romney in the 2012 Republican presidential primaries.

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