Poll: Congress Slightly More Popular Than Ebola

477484225After years of record-low approval ratings, the U.S. Congress’s overall approval score has has finally inched past that of the deadly Ebola virus.

According to a survey of 5,000 Americans conducted by TDC Polling Research, 12.8 percent approved of the job that Congress is doing, compared to 11.7 percent who said they approved of Ebola.

The survey also found that In a hypothetical midterm election match-up, 79.3 percent of those surveyed said they would reelect their current congressman or congresswoman over a hospital patient with Ebola – a result guaranteed to please both major political parties.

“Some people will accuse us of using an apples-and-oranges comparison of Congress and the Ebola virus in our survey,” TDC pollster Hari Seldon said. “However, we found that many of the people we spoke to had real difficulty deciding which they preferred: something that stops people from working, damages the economy, sows fear and distrust in the population, and kills thousands of foreigners – or a deadly virus.

“As usual, it came down to whichever was the lesser of two evils.”

Although the survey found that Congress remains less popular among Americans than cockroaches and hemorrhoids like it did a year ago, congressional Republican leaders hailed the results as evidence that there are Americans who still like them.

“I speak for myself and for many of my colleagues when I say we feel vindicated that the American people trust in our leadership of the country, more than they trust a fatal virus that causes vomiting, severe pain, bloody diarrhea, bleeding eyeballs, and death,” House Speaker John Boehner told reporters today. “I hope the American people remember this as they go to vote in the midterm elections this November.”

Democrats also praised the poll results for offering them a glimmer of hope, given their expected losses at the upcoming midterm elections.

“Ebola is so dangerous that President Obama has had to appoint an expert health czar to deal with it,” Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid said. “To our credit, things haven’t gotten so bad in Congress that the president needs to appoint a czar to delegate responsibility and make sure we’re doing what we’re supposed to.”

Previous articleWhich Violent NFL Player Are You?
Next articleMSU to Start Third-String Quarterback Versus Michigan

Leave a Reply

huzlers